Nostalgia Two

 As I journey through the gracefulness of aging, I find that politeness can be a form of avoidance. When I heard the phrase with a surprising tone, "Wow! "You look good for your age. "I often politely reply, "thanks" when in reality I wonder if I should really be insulted or annoyed.  Although, I know the person emitting the remarks means them as a compliment, there is a bit of condescending undertone.  After all why not just say, you look good today, or something like you must really take good care of your health.  You must exercise often.

Perhaps us maturing adults, should publish articles and pamphlets indicating the conversational etiquette which should be used when attempting to compliment a person of advancing age.

Still, I must admit that when I look into the mirror first thing in the morning, I wish my first thought would be something like that you look good for your age.  Or perhaps something like, not so bad.  No instead, the mental stream which goes more like, are there any physically recognizable features left of that thirty year old? Should I use more retinol?   Is cold-pressed black cumin seed oil really beneficial and should I consult my physician before starting to use it?   

I lift my eyebrows very high toward my hairline and do several extreme versions of facial yoga.  The fish-face exercise is a favorite.  You know the one where you raise your eyebrows upward, your jaw is lowered, your lips structuring the design of a fish stretching its mouth in a wide oval shape. And of course, there is the one where you fill your mouth with air and move your cheeks from side-to-side in an attempt to strengthen the facial muscles while reducing the frown lines.   

OH! Well!  Let's get out of this state of insignificant vanity and start the morning grooming, especially since a freshly completed shower and the lowering of the body from the midriff to brush the hair produces more facial vitality.   

Look deeper, whispered that perceptive inner voice, the hairline is thinning but your character is not.  With age for some reason the nose grows larger but also does your sense of patience and consideration.  Your kindness did not leave you and you still have a strong capacity to love.  

Remember the time when you attended the orchid show at the botanical garden and was mesmerized by their variety and beauty.  Or the time at the art museum  when you were so enthralled with a Claude Monet painting that you felt as if you were standing in his garden with him and he offered you some tea. And you will never forget the total awe experienced the day you visited the Canterbury Cathedral in Kent, England.  The massive size of the interior of that cathedral was breathtaking and humbling. And I know that you recall attending a violin concert by a noted European violinist whose name I have forgotten but I have not forgotten the fact that his brilliant performance brought tears to my eyes.

Realistically, if I spent too much time criticizing the inevitable changes of aging and not reflect on the contributions I made in the lives of others or the volunteerism or the hours of listening to classical music or the sheer appreciation of the beauty of nature,  I am when taking away some of the most precious gifts given in the forms of grace.